Comments on words / myth / ampers & virgule: Growing up is hard to do

Nancy,I've had my share of abusive bosses like the...

2006-06-04T20:09:23.263-04:00

Nancy,

I've had my share of abusive bosses like the one you describe. I couldn't have lasted sixteen years in that situation. Oh, wait. I take that back. My first marriage did last longer than that by a little bit.

But bullies like you're talking about had trouble with the fact that they couldn't make me cower no matter how loudly they yelled; so they invariably ended up firing me.

Excellent post! I have a current client who poses ...

2006-06-04T19:50:00.000-04:00

Excellent post! I have a current client who poses unusual challenges in the adult-child relationship, which I keep pushing back into the adult-adult mold: he's from Nigeria, where anyone providing a service does all but grovel. Today he called all the way from England in response to an email where I broke down the pricing for a new project, which will be higher than a previous one (as it's twice as long), and he said, "I was hurt by your email. It's as if you don't need my business," and talked to me like a child-servant. I pointed out that, indeed, at the price he wanted, I couldn't afford to keep his business, and that I work as a professional consultant, not in a servant relationship -- that business in this hemisphere is perhaps different than what he's used to. I suspect this client won't last long, and I think I know why he has gone through at least three previous consultants/freelancers.

Your post, and email on the list, was timely for me. Thank you for putting down what I've been saying for years. (And why I quit an abusive, 16-year-old job as a production manager under a publisher who regularly called me screaming obscenities and telling me that a trained monkey could do my job. I doubt he's found that trained monkey by now. I looked at some of their recent books in the store yesterday -- terrible quality now!)

Amen, brother! I'm new to freelancing, and I cert...

2006-06-02T15:57:00.000-04:00

Amen, brother! I'm new to freelancing, and I certainly want to be treated as an equal, not a slave. Problem is, companies are made up of individuals, who have been trained to expect the world from service providers. If a client doesn't want to treat me as an adult, they can hire a child instead.

Excellent post. The more you expect great treatmen...

2006-06-02T10:46:00.000-04:00

Excellent post. The more you expect great treatment from your clients, the better you will be treated. But it's a balancing act.

At the same time that you have to assert yourself and have certain expectations for your clients, you should also think of ways to help your clients so that they too see your respect for them. But matters like simple software downloads should never, ever be an issue in any self-employed professional's life if you have established yourself using your brand, your "special something" that makes you a better choice than the other folks.

Love it!Cecilia

2006-06-02T09:35:00.000-04:00

Love it!

Cecilia

I think the advice is good, generally. But I also ...

2006-06-02T09:18:00.000-04:00

I think the advice is good, generally. But I also think the professional has the responsibility to keep his/her equipment current and serviceable for client needs. I use a PC, for example, when I'd rather use a Mac, because 98% of my clients are on PCs and the other 2% know they're going to run into jams that are not my fault. If one is going to hang out one's shingle, one should be prepared to get the equipment required. Working on a Mac but then expecting PC clients to adjust to your eccentricity in zipping files, etc. is really not the same as flying to the client's city, etc. and so forth.

Harsh? Not at all. You gave excellent advice.

2006-06-02T08:55:00.000-04:00

Harsh? Not at all. You gave excellent advice.